By Terri Dee
Indiana News Service
INDIANA — Birth doulas assist new moms with the stress, uncertainty and anxiety of childbirth. Another type of doula offers similar support – to those who are dying. Death doulas, or end-of-life specialists, give spiritual and emotional support to people nearing death in a non-medical setting, and to their families after the transition. The word ‘doula’ comes from the Greek word doule’, meaning ‘female helper.’
Joy Kahn Harter, a mental health counselor for Anchored Passages in Bloomington, specializes in grief and loss. She encourages open dialogue about what is often an uneasy subject to discuss.
“It is truly educating, advocating and connecting people to either present or future resources that will serve them, and underscoring the choices that people do, in fact, have – that many people don’t realize that they have,” she said.
Harter added one request she has received is with planning an advance directive – instructions a person can leave behind about their funeral service or cremation, what to do with a pet, or help writing a loving message to family and friends. In 2021, there were about 1,000 per 100,000 residents, with the average mortality at age 76.
Death, or what is sometimes called ‘the other side,’ can produce feelings of fear, or a sense of denial – especially if a terminal illness has been diagnosed.
Abby Vincent, a death doula with Joy’s House in Indianapolis, said some people really ‘lean into’ the conversation – and others shy away from it.
“And I think it takes somebody who is comfortable with the topic themselves; takes somebody who’s a good listener – that is so much a part of it – and is able to hold compassion and space for some of those hard conversations that need to happen. Because there are some beautiful moments that happen during the dying process,” she explained.
Training to become a death doula happens in workshops, with required reading and work-study assignments. Since it is not a federally recognized field, insurance companies don’t cover these services.
Vincent said she relies on word of mouth and invitations from churches and community groups hosting end-of-life meetings as educational opportunities about the death doula industry.
